Welcome to Apex Magazine issue 139.
This issue is full of messy relationships and difficult feelings. I love stories with this type of complexity. Stories where readers can see themselves in the characters and can empathize when a decision needs to be made, but none of the choices are good. I think it gives us all a chance to grant ourselves and those around us a little more grace, because these stories remind us that we’re all human and life is messy.
The issue opens with “The Monster Fucker Club” by A.V. Greene, which is a complicated story about teenage girls dealing with their reality by sleeping with monsters. In a world teetering on the edge of a climate disaster, full of angry people who would rather protect our youth from library books than from AR-15s, is it wrong to seek comfort and self-worth in the arms of a monster? This isn’t an easy question to answer, because yes, it’s dangerous and makes the girls “weird” to their peers, but their monsters are loyal and make them feel good and alive, if only for a few minutes. I invite you to read this story and then sit with it before passing judgment.
Christopher Rowe’s “Dolly Girl” tells the story of Constance Faraday. A young woman who, like generations of women in her family, was born with a Whisper Girl around her neck. She’s always there and even though Connie knows that she lies, she can’t help but listen to the Whisper Girl’s constant whispers. Whispers telling Connie to do terrible things—encouraging her to blind men and cause women to become barren. Connie resists, but will she be able to forever? When a woman shows up at Connie’s apartment claiming she can help Connie get rid of the Whisper Girl, things start to get weird.
Amal Singh returns to Apex Magazine with a cli-fi story titled “Island Circus.” In a water-ravaged world where most people live in floating blocks of homes called socs, being dependable and fitting in are very important. But the narrator’s sibling isn’t interested in fitting in and being like everyone else. They don’t want to waste their time struggling just to keep afloat. They want to be a Ringmaster and run away with the Island Circus. This story explores complicated sibling relationships where one sibling feels the need to cover for and make excuses for the other, all while feeling a sense of resentment and not understanding why their sibling can’t just go along with everyone else. It’s a beautiful story in an unfamiliar landscape where learning to be true to yourself is a process that can take a lifetime.
Sometimes when we finally get out of a toxic, abusive relationship, we spend a lot of time wondering about what could have been, what we could have done differently to make our abuser treat us better, trying to pinpoint exactly when things started to go so wrong. Sachiko Ragosta explores these feelings of trying to fix a hopelessly broken relationship in “But I Loved You” by giving their protagonist the ability to create a new and improved version of their girlfriend Ryoko—Ryoko 2.0—built from photographs, videos, and memories. Unfortunately, broken relationships aren’t easy to fix, no matter how hard you try.
On the surface, “The Discarded Ones” by Linda Niehoff seems like a pretty straightforward story. You can adopt ghosts that need loving homes until they pass on. It even has a Sarah McLachlan/SPCA-esque sad commercial. But if you dig a little deeper, “The Discarded Ones” is so much more. This story deals with the effects of growing up with an emotionally distant parent. It deals with loneliness, depression, and the need for a cozy space that makes you feel safe. This story deals with acceptance. Not the acceptance of others, so much as the acceptance of yourself and seeing the value you bring to the world. It is beautiful and emotional, and I hope you love it just as much as I do.
The Magazine of Horror” is Oghenechovwe Donald Ekpeki’s first published flash fiction piece, documenting the submission of a story to a magazine that claims to publish the best horror story ever written. There are a lot of rumors surrounding this publication, and as the author corresponds with the editors, the validity of these rumors becomes all too clear.
Our two regular flash fiction stories this issue are “Gim of P” by Benjamin DeHaan, a weird sci-fi story written for the purification theme and “You and Me and The End” by Mona West, an apocalyptic story written for the rain theme.
Our classic fiction stories this issue are by Endria Isa Richardson and Walidah Imarisha. Endria brings us an emotionally driven story that is sure to break your heart. Walidah gives us a brief break from the intensity of the rest of the issue with an entertaining zombie tale that has a great twist.
Our nonfiction essays this month are by Andrea Johnson and Rick Hipson. Andrea explores storytelling outside of language by examining Genndy Tartakovsky's cartoon Primal. Rick delves into the intricacies of the character Renfield in Bram Stoker’s Dracula.
Marissa van Uden conducted our author interviews with A.V. Greene and Sachiko Ragosta. Both authors bring fantastic insight into their stories, their motivations for writing them, and the process of getting them on the page. Bradley Powers chatted with cover artist Lauren Raye Snow about her process and the importance of representation in art.
I hope that when you get to the end of this issue, you have allowed yourself to experience the big emotions these stories deal with and realize that you aren’t alone. Relationships can be hard. Emotions can be messy. And sometimes we make decisions that feel good in the moment, but aren’t right for us in the long term. That’s okay. Give yourself the space to make mistakes and to figure out what kind of person you want to be in this world.
Until next time, yours in reading,
Lesley Conner
Co-Editor-in-Chief
